You got it confused

Men and Women alike tend to think that they can do "again" what he/she did "then"; believe that someone is going to put up with being taken for granted, used, abused, and unappreciated. You got it confused if you think you don't need to change something about yourself. Men and women take their chances on "trying" to get away with everything they can. We as creatures of habit refuse to accept that we can't go into a new relationship, job, or venture with the same attitude, expectations, and thought process. What didn't work the first time, won't work the next time.  

PRIDE

What is it about pride that makes a person too stubborn to admit they're wrong or made a mistake. Pride is the one thing that will knock you on your ass and leave you where you fall. Pride makes you believe you will never need anyone. In some instances, pride builds character and endurance. Pride can keep you motivated and focused.

Let Go...

If you're holding on to someone who doesn't want to be held, let go. If you're keeping someone hanging by string, let go. If you're holding on to bitterness, let go. If you're hanging on to the past, let go. If you're holding on to the idea that someone will change for you, let go. If you think he/she will eventually love you the way you deserve, let go. If you think he/she is going to change his/her evil ways, let go. When you let go of these things, only then will you be able to hold on to yourself.

What works for you!!

What works for you may not work for others. Embrace your uniqueness, special fashion style, quirky personality, and indifferences. Rather you like a bald-head, afro, twists or dreads; weave, short hair, mohawk, natural, or finger-waves...it's your choice. Be who you are and make it work for you. If what matters to you doesn't matter to others, it's okay. Liberal or conservative, that's your choice, too. Don't let others make you into what and who they want you to be. Just make it work!

Where are all the good men gone?

I refuse to believe that they are dead or gay. I refuse to believe that there aren't any left. They are hiding from gold-diggers, thieves, and liars. They are staying away from drama, ignorance, and psychos. I know they desire to be found by someone who will appreciate them. I know they want to be loved just as hard as they love. I'm sure they are out there in the midst of the ones who appear to be a good man; who deceive, lie, and cheat. I'm certain that the good ones don't feel the need to stand out amongst them by boasting and bragging. They just walk with their heads high and quiet as can be; waiting for that one to weed through the bad ones in order to appreciate the good ones even more. The good men aren't gone...some women just don't understand how to look deep enough.

Good one gone!

Yes, it's your fault. You did all the right things in the beginning that made him/her fall head-over-heels for you then you stopped. In the palm of your hands you had a man/woman that would've had your back, defended you-right or wrong, been your best friend, talked to you about everything, stayed by your side in good and bad times, and loved you with every fiber of his/her being. You didn't appreciate him/her. Instead, you took him/her for granted. You let something get away that most people have been searching and wanting for years. Sadly, it's going to take someone ten times the effort now to restore the heart of the good one you made walk out of your life.

A good man (poem)

It’s been three days since you walked out that door

But I would swear it seems like three months

I was foolish and I realized it the next morning

When I woke up alone and lost without you

Because on the day you left I let my pride hide the truth

And not admit that I really didn’t want you to go

Knowing I would’ve actually fell to my knees crying

Holding onto your legs as though my life depended on it

They say an independent black woman would never put herself out like that

Never show that she has to beg a man to stay even if she was wrong

I say to hell with them because this woman has to fall from her own pedestal

I must show you that I’m not too proud to beg for a second chance

Ask you for your forgiveness and be in my life once again

I wouldn’t care if my girlfriends say I was weak

I’m acting like a puppy dog without its master

For they don’t know what type of man I let walk out of my life

They have no inclination as to how you made love to me

Taking me to heights unknown, to the wildest of imagination

The way you have me spelling your name as I reach my climax

And after, can do nothing but fall into a deep peaceful sleep

Maybe it was that time in the kitchen that has me so bewildered at this moment

When you came home late and I started an argument just because

And then you wouldn’t let me get another word in before you cornered me

Made me forget what I was mad about and the dinner burned

How you work from morning til night and sometimes on weekends

Making sure I wanted for nothing, I had everything I needed

See I put up this front for my girlfriends had them believing

That I had you whipped, sorrowful without me

They thought you couldn’t breathe had I not given you air

All this I did to make sure no one could look down at me for any reason

Forgetting where we started from and how we got to be where we are now

You being the man you are put up with all my changes and foolishness

I ignored you when you tried to tell me of my destructive path

So now that I see for myself I must break it down, and come back black

Ole skool style, and I’m sure you will understand

I know you’re a good man, a strong black brotha who never once

Forgot how to treat a sista, a Nubian queen in your eyes

Showing a sista that not all black men are dogs, still a few cats left

Now it is my time to show you a strong black sista who’s determined to keep her man

I pawned the diamond bracelets, diamond rings, gold chains and even the pearls

Their value is insignificant compared to what holds more worth to me

Went as far as to cut up the credit cards and cash in on the cd’s and bonds

Closed out the account that you faithfully deposited into every week

Sold those paintings that had no cultural meaning or purpose

I went out, got a second job and stopped by the dealership

Traded in the Bentley for that drop-top candy apple red Rolls Royce

You know the one with the peanut-butter leather and suede interior

With a wood grain steering wheel and twelve inch woolfers

It’s the same one you keep a picture of in your drawer next to the bed

Along with that homemade card I gave you after our first date

Baby I know this can’t make up for all the mistakes I’ve made

But I promise that from everyday here on, I will cherish your love

Never taking you for granted, a good man, my man.

Heal my wounded heart

Love can leave battle scars that won’t heal because of fear. So many say that it gets easier with time, but it doesn’t. That pain stays with you either consciously or subconsciously. You want to move on and love again, but you can’t. You don’t know what it’s going to take to help you. You’re not sure what you did to be subjected to so much heartache when all you did was love. And each day as you ask yourself “why me?” is another day that the wound stays open. Then someone comes along who appears to be good and right, but that open wound will not allow you to explore the possibility. After a while, that wound will fill with bitterness and anger. How can the heart heal when you won’t let it? You find yourself in a world of complacent acceptance-nothing in, and nothing out-nothing gained, and nothing loss. Heal my wounded heart you say…do you want it? Or do you want to hang on to that pain a while longer. The healing starts with you because not everyone is out to hurt but to restore.  

When he won't do right...

Just because you give him your all doesn't mean he'll give you his. No matter how hard you try to push, encourage, or want him to do the right thing(s), he won't if he doesn't want to. If he doesn't give you the attention you give him; it's not because he can't...he doesn't want to. When he won't take care of his children financially, it's not that he can't, he doesn't want to. When a male refuses to be a man, when he won't do right by his woman or God, you can't make him and God doesn't force him!