Raising your husband's children

For privacy purposes I will change the names of persons involved.....

Lisa did everything she knew how to make her marriage work with Todd. No matter how many times he cheated, she still took him back. They have been married for over six years and he has fathered two children with other women. As much as Lisa wanted children, she couldn't carry one to full term. But, that didn't stop her from trying. When she learned about the child her husband conceived with another woman, she was devastated. Still, she forgave him. Two years later, a second child came, and the other woman decided that she wasn't going to raise the child as a single parent, so she dropped the child off at Todd and Lisa's home, and told them to raise him. Lisa agreed. One year after that, with no change in Todd's behavior, the first born child came to live with them because the mother died. Now, Lisa is raising both children alone because she could not take the cheating any more and has filed for a divorce. 

Window Shopping

You’re out but not necessarily looking for anything in particular; just hoping something catches your eye. When you see it in the window, you smile. You’re thinking, that would look nice on me, I would look good in that, and I can work with it. Then, you say, “Nah!” that might to be what I want, I don’t know if I’m ready to make that investment, and maybe it won’t be my size.” In reality, you won’t know until you try it own. Don’t worry about the price you’ll pay for it because when you realize that it looks nice on your, and you look good in that, and you worked it, then the cost would’ve been worth it-even if you decide you don’t want it anymore, or you have to put it to the back of the closet.

Window shopping is used as a metaphor to how we approach relationships. We aren’t always looking for the perfect man/woman, but sometimes one comes our way and take our breath away. Sometimes we go out looking, and what we find isn’t what we were looking for-then refuse to buy into love again. Love isn’t perfect. It’s about investing time, patience, respect, honesty, and effort. It doesn’t always work out as we hope, and sometimes it does. Starting a new relationship is like window shopping; you have to try it on and see how it feels. You have to walk around in it, and see if it conforms to your needs and expectations. And as long as you work at making it fit right, look right, and feel right then you have invested well.

It's not easy to love a man after he's been hurt badly

Men are very prideful. They don't wear their emotions on their sleeve like women, and the majority of the time, no one will ever know just how badly they've been hurt. Men will avoid relationships entirely or date multiple women at one time so not to aquire feelings. He will date any woman who does not resemble the one who hurt him and is the total opposite. In light of his behavior, he will not consider the idea of developing another committed relationship. Any woman that happens to feel deeply for this man may have a battle on her hands. It may be a battle she can't win if she's not strong enough, wise enough, or patient enough to stick it out.

Friends of the opposite sex

Men and women are capable of being friends without having sex; or are they? If one is single and the other one is in a relationship, is it possible for a man and woman to remain friends? We all know that there is a limit on the conversations men and women can share if they want to avoid crossing that line of intimacy, but it doesn't necessarily mean that the conversation will lead to sex between them....or would it?

Forbidden Love

Life is bad enough when you can't seem to find that right one. The one who has those special qualities that you want, the ability to make you smile even when you want to cry, and the one who you can talk to about everything. It's even worse when you find those qualities in your best friend, or someone who is gay and will never see in you what you found in them.

Bi-Sexuality...Which is more accepting?

Men seem to be more accepting of a woman who enjoys being with another woman. In some cases, it's a man's fantasy to have a threesome or to simple watch two women together. In a marriage, most couples will explore the idea in order to bring a little more excitement into the bedroom. However, the husband will not invite another man to join him and his wife into the bedroom. Rarely would a woman find herself being in a relationship with a man who prefers to be with men, too. A woman can't conceive the idea of her man sexing another man in front of her. Women would consider it to be disgusting, maybe appalling, and a major turn off. Is it possible for people to be involved with someone who is bi-sexual? Could the relationship survive?

The men in prison, and the women who love them

Many women complain that there are no good men left for them to love so they end up loving the ones in prison. Honestly, I still don't understand how this is possible, but evidently its happening more and more. What attracts a woman to a man in prison serving five to ten five? Is it something about herself that makes her feel as though this is the only love she is so deserving of; she needs? I've witnessed a few women who have supported these men, and upon his release, he ends up with another woman.It is clear that some men want and need someone to support them; have someone/anyone to care enough to send money, a card, and a letter every now and then. And, if the communication last during the course of his confinement, he would hope that woman will provide him with a place to stay once he is released, if he doesn't have another woman on standby. But, what about all the truly good men she passes up while waiting on this one man? (The only exception for these types of women for these men are the ones who went to prison for protecting their family.)

Two can play that game!

People consider it the "norm" for men to date multiple women, but when women do it, they are considered as "loose" and a whore. There are some women who actually enjoy being single, and free to go out with/date multiple men. For a woman it doesn't always have to be about sex. But the delima that I'm faced with is...is it okay for a woman to have sex with a man she has no intentions on building a relationship with? Is it okay for her to simply want the sex? 

The dating process

The dating process has become a tedious process that many find a waste of time because they end up not being with the person they spent weeks and months getting to know. In turn, this takes people through an emotional rollercoaster of not wanting to go through the process again. Is there an easy way to do this process without wasting so much time? Is it better just to get the important questions out by the second date (if there is one)?